After much advance notice I have modified it now but still managed to occupy myself more closely with this long overdue review.
Already Ovid tells in his Metamorphoses by the beautiful youth Narcissus, who, hopelessly in love with his reflection is, in the final, inevitable consequence of that very excessive self-love based. What seems prima facie
in the original myth as a harsh denunciation of immoderate selfishness, overtakes his just punishment allowed, on a far more sublime level, however, a completely different, metaphorical reading in which it definitely not about punishment and sentencing to a disapproving, anti-social character weakness, but rather the mere description of a neutral, psychologically relevant clinical picture together with all its pains.
this reading is precisely the one who turns to the analyst Alice Miller in her essay-tinged Review. Where in the everyday language usually dominate common resentment and moral Negativkonnotationen, she illuminates the Narzissmusdebatte in Drama of the Gifted Child instead of a purely therapeutic, and attachment theory based perspective that takes all the unnecessary, normative ballast welcome way out of focus.
Your narcissist is not contemptible, swaggering showmanship that only himself and no one else knows, but rather a desperate, involuntary pleasing creatures on the hopeless, constantly doomed, indeed, almost tragic search for yourself because only his rigid, no doubt wonderful nice reflection is it that can love the unfortunate in itself and must, every deviant behavior led it immediately and inevitably lead to loss of self ie, to move away from single, previously unknown and, therefore, necessary for survival, although false sense of identity and security. Narcissist can not and does everything else and Uncharmantere what its beauty onto and off of those veiled most reliable faded completely, so do not see. Emotion management takes place. All the dark or in other ways as negative felt emotions that are taking place behind the beautiful facade, ignored and eliminated - and demand but their revenge tribute in the form of a for Narcissus itself inexplicable, internal void, which it for reasons of compensation now But even more intense in its most idealized, but false and incomplete mirror-I binding. This emptiness is nothing but the painful feeling of separateness from what is Narcissus in its totality and in all his riches sensation or at least could be, he finally distanced himself only by his fixation on the fatal indeed charming, but this frightening image anemic - a distorted reality disabled hypostasis of itself, which is consequently not as strong, vibrant base for a fulfilling Ichwerdung. Of the consuming desire for the ego driven, Narcissus drowns in some versions of the myth finally with vain attempt to unite with his dazzling reflection in the water, without first recognized that a change of perspective from the outside in, toward you and would have brought the integration of its real needs, perhaps the solution to his dilemma with the unconscious. The path of constant self-denial in favor of a chimerical ideal that does not allow any variance leads, the latest being inevitable, self-inflicted death of the ego - or in other words, in the depression that is not so basically nothing but a costumed and therefore first unobtrusive, so less directed against the self destructiveness.
Miller refers through its unconventional interpretation not only to an often and willingly overlooked dimension of the Narcissus myth but reveals in the same breath that the narcissistic person is by no means equipped with an incredibly big ego, but to the contrary but under the non- existence or has only just such a makeshift formation. The meaning of the original terminology is almost turned on its head. The narcissist wants to please, no doubt, is courteous, helpful, adapts itself, is - always a paragon of civility and restraint, his best is often successful, much of what he takes in hand is possible, too - is happening but all this is never malicious or calculus in the hope of strategic advantage over others. It is simply to be the elixir of life to be admired by all, and vowed to unduly enrich not around, but because it is all that remains for him. The positive feedback from other people for take it over in this way the same function as before the mirror of Narcissus and of their estimates he therefore always in the highest degree on left is the only one to convey the literal sense I-less narcissists another existentially essential residual sense of self-identity can. That alone adds it together yet, gives it shape and allows it to function properly in its social role. But woe to the positive regard of self-objects is, whether in the form of rejection, criticism or failure - for the narcissist here breaks a world collapse.
What other merely a harmless scratches, is quickly forgotten and not worth mentioning, is the narcissistic people in need of a little to absorb, almost fatal blow, from which he was without professional help is difficult or not at all recovered ...
Miller explained on the basis of many illustrative examples and parables, such as a so-crafted, narcissistic personality disorder may come about that early childhood trauma play a role and initial conditions which favor the prevalence of the described symptom complex. They often draws on their own experiences of this disease affected patients and their descriptions back and worked out in this context that biographical vertices having a majority of those affected striking parallels. Central importance in this context mainly attributed to the disturbed mother-child bond, which results in most cases, the unstable nature of the mother, which - in turn been an increased need mithineintragend in the relationship - abuse that the child unconscious in order to by means of various manipulations (often under the guise of alleged Care) to last however, can still sneak the attention and respect those who had granted her own life never sufficient extent.
Miller demonstrates vividly that even how common it that unresolved conflicts are unknowingly passed down from parent to child generation and finally there undisturbed, as long undetected, concealed for fear of rejection or simply not taken seriously reflected in the form of massive, mental impairments can.
Conclusion:
A highly worth reading, for a stimulating post-and re-thinking, never anachronistic classic whose reading is recommended not only for parents or educational professionals employed alone, but also all other educational and psychological interested in a comprehensive insight into the fragile human nature and especially children's mental life granted. In addition, analytical models provide Miller a welcome antidote to currently resurgent, repressive tendencies within the educational discourse (see also previously thematized Tyrant series by Michael Winter Hoff ).
A generally very successful plea for more care and empathy in dealing with children, which neither the many psychoanalytic bonds that do not like to be everyone's thing, nor the educational trend anti-authoritarian attitude Miller that some probably remain suspicious if only out of habit must do an abortion.
5 of 5 stars.
Teresa Maienschein
0 comments:
Post a Comment